Pissedofflazyrant.

I would be a better man if I would wake up earlier than I do now. I would be a better man if I would run five miles and eat right and read a book a week. Or two. Maybe three. I would then feel so much better about myself than I do now so much that I would not try to be a better man anymore.

I would then paint the most beautiful painting in the world and learn how to play the blues on the harmonica in three and a half hours. I would look at everyone and smile, for I'd be a better man. I'd never fall sick and kick ass at white water rafting and do parkour on the streets of Rio de Janiero while simultaneously eating caesar salad with the right fork. I would come home earlier and show my brother all the animated movies I'd gotten for him and get groceries for mom and check whether the mangoes were really good before buying them.

I would be a better man if I would move on. And stop thinking about it. If I would do ten more pushups and not think too much about the two fluorescent green eyeballs I saw under the bed a while ago. With an orange pupil on the left and blue on the right eye. Or was in the other way round. I would hold doors open for strangers and own a black mask and cape in a secret subterranean vault under my room.

I would be a better man if I would get up earlier than I do now.

Thats why I do not want to be a better man.

Ask me again tomorrow.